Me latey

I really haven't taken the time to sit down and write a good post lately. Too busy with the boys or too stressed out to put what I feel into words! But Jonah is taking a late nap and Noah is watching the Disney Channel so I figured I would take a few a write a little!

I hate the way that I am feeling lately. I have been lazy, depressed, and so not nice to my boys. I don't really know what is wrong. Other than the same things that have been wrong for years. Maybe it is just this pregnancy? Really everything is great, I just don't see it that way. Our main problem is our financial difficulty. I know I don't need money to make me happy. It's been this way for a long time. I have a wonderful husband, most of the time!, 2 beautiful boys, a wonderful family, a home and everything that I need to make me happy. I just feel horrible that when Noah wants something so simple, like his cheese pups I have to say you have to wait a few days. Or until next week when we buy groceries. He doesn't understand and then cries. And me being the mean mother that I have let myself grow into the past couple of weeks, yell at him for nothing. He doesn't know any better. To him money is something that Daddy and Mommy have and can get him anything that he wants. So then after I've yelled at him then I go and feel guilty. Which just adds to the depressed way that I've been feeling. Right now my house is a wreck and I really need to clean up to get ready for the new baby. I can't even feel happy about that right now. I mean, I am happy, but it is stuck somewhere in the back of all of these other feelings. I feel so mean, so ugly, so fat, so ungrateful to God and everything he has given me. Why do I feel this way? I am usually a happy-go-lucky kind of girl. Everything is great and even if wasn't you wouldn't know it from me.
I normally don't mind having an unkempt home if I am happy and playing with my boys. I don't mind having a couple of dishes in the sink until they go to bed if we are playing or reading books. I don't mind folding clothes while Jonah is napping and Noah watching t.v while I do, or even wanting to help me. I am glad that I am not the type of girl who has to have everything scheduled and fit into a certain order. I just love my family and want them to know it too! And these past few weeks I don't think that they do. Or at least not feeling all of the love that I do have for them.

I saw in a post at the Preacher's Wife something that made me cry. She said why is it that praying is often the last thing we think about doing, when it should have been the first? I am getting off the computer now and going to pray for a long time. I love everyone and most of all I love my Jesus and know at times He is only one that can help me feel better.

Happy Birthday Granny!

Today is my Granny's Birthday. We are all going to eat at a seafood restaurant tonight to celebrate. I love my granny and I am so glad to have my children know her as well. Happy Birthday Granny, we all love you so much!

It is also my nephew Caleb's birthday today. His parents are having a party for him on Sat at their house. Happy Birthday Caleb!

Never Forget

I remember being at work and hearing about it from a customer. Afterward we were very slow, probably didn't have 15 customers all day. I remember going to the bathroom and crying and praying. I will never forget that day. And I hope you don't either.

It's a Baby...

Well, I guess I will need to change the name of the old blog! We are having a little girl! We are very excited and so unprepared! We are looking forward to this new challenge in our lives but we know that God would not have blessed us with another baby if we could not handle it.

Cheese Pups

Jonah has a habit of running in and turning off the T.V. while Noah is watching it. Usually a chase occurs after this with me yelling for Noah to get off of Jonah. Today this happens while Noah is eating Cheese Pups, aka Cheetos. He says to me, "Mom, could you please turn the T.V. back on. I'm too busy to chase Jonah right now, I'm eating Cheese pups!" I couldn't help but laugh!

Back from the beach

Just a few pictures of our trip! I will post more when I get more time. We are dealing with 2 sick boys and it is not fun! We had fun on our vacation and can't wait to get back!!

Our view from the porch!

At last...

Well, this will probably be my last post for a least a week. We are finally heading to the beach tomorrow morning! I am so excited!

Well I have a lot to do-washing clothes, packing, and getting everything together. Andrew has to work late tonight. Great, I get to most of it all my myself! I actually have a lot of things already packed and ready to go. The boys are packed so that helps a lot.

Hope everyone has a great week and I'll see you when we get back!

A Giveaway

One of my favorite reads, Musings of a Housewife is giving away a beautiful necklace!! Check it out here! All you have to do is leave a comment of which piece you would like to win! So easy!

This past week...

I am so sorry it is taking me so long to get on here and post! I was playing with the background, isn't it cute? So I decided I can take a minute and write about what happened this past week. Although, not much has!

The truck needs brakes, which means that Andrew has been taking the car to work for the past two weeks and I for the most part, have been stuck at home! It really is better...I can't really spend money if I'm at home, and the gas were are saving is great!

Last Saturday my parents had a back to school event at their church. It was fun, lots of little pools, a slip and slide and a big splash pool slide. Noah and Jonah loved it!

Let's see, what else? The boys went to the doctor for check-ups last Tuesday. Jonah had to get 3 shots. Noah needs like 5 before he starts school! I asked if he wanted to go ahead and get them, he said he would wait! It doesn't bother him to get shots, but maybe 5 at one time, I think I would say I'll wait too!

Other than that, and getting a bigger belly, we have been staying home,watching the girls, cooking, cleaning, and getting the boys in bed by 8:30-9 every night. It has been nice. This week we will be getting ready to head to the beach! Yes, it is finally here!

random new

It has been a while since I posted. Just getting back into the swing of things with 4 kids running around, needing to eat, really needing to nap, but refusing too...ect.

I had a doctor appointment on Monday. I didn't gain any weight! Yeah for me! It took the doctor a while to find the heartbeat, probably because I am so fat on top of being pregnant:), and we must have looked a little worried. She said it is like a game of cat and mouse and found it and it sounded great. She said everything was great. I am having a sonogram next month and we will finally find out if we are having another boy or a girl.

We are going to the beach in 2 weeks from tomorrow! I cannot wait! I love the beach, always have, always will! It is just so relaxing listening to the waves, walking on the sand...I just love it. It will be great to have my mom there with us. Not just so she can help watch the boys, although that will be nice, but I haven't had much time to spend with her since I found out I was pregnant. I love the fact that we are so much closer now than we have ever been.

We had a visit with Andrew's mom today. She came by to see the boys for a couple of hours. It wasn't too hot, so we sat outside and had Popsicles.

Tomorrow Pa and Ma are taking Noah to their church for a back to school party. He spent the night with them tonight to be there early...on time. I have a tendency to be a little late. Not on purpose, I just don't plan ahead. But I am getting better. I am going to try to get Jonah there too, mainly to get some pictures! I do love taking pictures. Have a great weekend!